Gossip and the Spirit

January 16, 2009 | Leave a Comment

Gossiping can suck the zest out of your spirit. Gossip is mean-spirited and little-minded; its goal is to make the gossipers feel superior to the gossiped-about. It is seductive, addictive and a way of bonding with other gossipers, all while pulling you down to the lowest spiritual common denominator. Gently observe your interactions with others, and catch yourself if you feel you are getting sucked into gossip.

Let’s define what gossip is and is not. Gossip is judgmental chit-chat about another person or group. It is conversation that lacks compassion for the other party, and sets up an "us versus them" mentality. It pits one viewpoint against another, with that of the gossipers as better than the others. Gossip tends to make the gossipers feel better by stroking their egos. It severs the gossiper’s connection to their true essence, which is love. Gossip sounds like this: "I can’t believe our neighbors put out those hideous pink flamingo sculptures in their front yard! It looks so trashy! They even have wings that rotate in the wind and make the worst noise. What horrid taste! Can you believe it?"

Observations, on the other hand, are more neutral statements of how you see a situation or a person. We are presented with much diversity in our world and our experiences, and our job is to decide what experiences, attitudes, perceptions and people we want to welcome into our lives. We must discern which path will be ours. Observations can include a discernment statement, as in, "Our neighbors put up pink flamingos in their front yard. That’s not my style, so I won’t be doing the same." The observation includes an implicit respect for the other person’s tastes or decisions, acknowledging that we all have our foibles.

So what can you do when other people are trying to suck you into a gossip session? Here are some suggestions:

Be aware. In order to do anything, you have to be aware of what’s going on. Gossip has a different energy from observations, so start observing your feelings and your spirit as you converse with others. Try to discern whether the conversation has the heavy, judgmental feel of gossip or is still in the energy range of non-judgmental observations. Be gentle with yourself – we all gossip from time to time, but the first step to a gossip-free, more spirit-filled life is to be aware of when it happens.
Be silent. I have a friend who is my personal gossip police, even though she doesn’t know it. Every time I steer our conversation toward even a mildly gossipy statement, she gives me a look (that I now recognize) and says nothing. I know I need to shut up – fast – before I jump over the precipice into that nasty river of hatefulness and judgment. Practice being silent – it can be highly effective with people who are sensitive to the ill effects of gossip.
Use shock and awe statements. I remember being a software support representative in San Francisco in the mid-1980’s – not so long after the Summer of Love and its infamy. I was on the phone with a customer who asked where we were located. When I told him our office was in San Francisco, he spewed, "Oh yeah, the city of fruits and nuts!" Rather than follow his lead, I replied with a shock and awe statement that shut him up, "Yes, San Franciscans accepts everyone’s eccentricities, including mine."
Refuse to engage. This is highly effective. It’s like a martial art – you deflect the attack and turn the energy away from danger. You do this in conversation either by changing the subject or replying to a judgmental statement with a neutral observation.

Be your own gossip police and put a stop to gossip’s negative energy in your life!

Posted by admin | Filed Under Mindfulness, The Journey, blog

New Year Self Examination

December 30, 2008 | Leave a Comment

The new year is fast approaching, and now is a perfect time to take a few quiet moments to examine your life’s journey over the past year and look ahead to the promise of the coming year. I try to do some comprehensive journaling at this time of year, and find that self-examination is especially helpful as you look ahead. I’ve created a list of questions to help you examine the past year and plan for the new one.

I am not a great fan of setting goals for a year at a time. The reason for that is that life seems to bring changes that I can’t predict 12 months in advance. But I am a proponent of setting over-arching themes to a year and a few specific goals, such as an overall financial goal, and then revising them every three months or so. The tendency for life to throw curve balls at you is the reason that some corporations revise their budgets every quarter, to account for mid-course corrections. As an example of a curve ball I received, last December, I set myself a goal of making X dollars per month by September 2008 from my blogsite. I didn’t achieve that goal for several reasons that I couldn’t have anticipated a year ago, but I sure learned a lot from the experience! Interestingly, I did achieve the overall financial goal I set for this year, but in far different ways than I anticipated. So, I recommend you set overall goals but leave room for God to fill in the specifics of how you will achieve them. Indeed, expecting divine intervention and surprises is what makes goal setting fun and exciting!

As you prepare to answer these questions, you might go back to your calendar or journal and review your activities for each month of the year to remember what you did – memories can be fleeting.

Here are the questions – my new year’s gift to you:

Looking back:

What successes did you have this year? What were your inner successes, such as a change in perspective, forgiving someone, letting go of old hurts, etc? What were your outer successes or tangible achievements?
What were the lessons learned this year, perhaps from difficult situations? What good came from the hardships you endured? (If you are reading this, one good thing is that you survived!) From these lessons, what can you remember and apply to the coming year’s activities to make you wiser, stronger, healthier or more prosperous?
What were some of the Kodak moments that I want to remember from this year? (Kodak moments are those times when you want to capture the picture or feeling of the experience forever.) It might be with your family, in nature, with friends. It might be an awe-inspiring experience on a busy street corner.

Looking ahead to the coming year and beyond:

What would you like to do to improve or maintain your physical body’s health and well-being? This could include diet, exercise, medical interventions and rest.
What steps will you take to improve or maintain your social relationships, such as those with your family? What about the quality of your friendships? Do you have at least one person with whom you can confide some of your deepest thoughts? What can you do to improve or maintain these connections?
What is your financial goal for next year? What are the steps that you will take to achieve them?
What are you tolerating in your daily life? In other words, are there minor irritants in your life that, once eliminated, could make your life flow more smoothly? What five tolerations could you eliminate in the coming 30 days?
How can you advance your career this year? What steps can you take to enrich yourself or your business to take it to the next level? Are there educational opportunities that you should take advantage of?
What can you do to improve your spiritual life? Are there some practices, such as prayer, meditation, reading or being in nature, that you could incorporate into your daily routine? How can you feed your spirit this year?
How can you be of service to others? Can you give back to your community in a new way this year? What would make your heart sing while serving others?
Lastly, what one big goal do you have for your life? What would make you happiest, most fulfilled, most purposeful in the next 10, 20, 30 or 40 years? What is your plan to achieve it?

Happy New Year!

Posted by admin | Filed Under The Journey, Work, blog

The Longest Night of the Year

December 21, 2008 | Leave a Comment

Today is the Winter Solstice, the longest night of the year in the northern hemisphere. Solstice was and still is celebrated by many earth-based religions as the time to embrace and celebrate the darkness while, at the same time, we turn toward the hope and promise of the lengthening daylight and the strengthening of the sun. Human beings yearn for the sun and the daylight, giving rise to our celebrations of candle lighting at this time of the year. Even though we turn toward the sun, how can we embrace the darkness and welcome its gifts into our lives at this special time of year?

Darkness doesn’t represent only evil and the absence of hope. Darkness is gestational, as in the darkness of the womb. Darkness is the quiet of the night, a rest for weary eyes and limbs. It is a time of renewal, of looking inward, of preparing for the spring that will assuredly arrive.

Amidst all the revelry of this happy, holy holiday time, take some time to ponder what you are gestating. What are you preparing for? Is it your best life, or your best year, or just another good turning of the sun? Is there music in your heart that must sing? Is there poetry that you must pen? Is there a dance for your happy feet? Consider all these things and ponder them in your heart. Welcome the blessings of the darkness.

This is not the time to make big plans – that comes next week as we celebrate New Years and consider how to shape the coming year. Now is the time to cherish your dreams and let them simmer in the giant cauldron of your soul.

Happy Solstice!

Posted by admin | Filed Under Newest Posts, The Journey

Look Up and See the Stars!

December 15, 2008 | Leave a Comment

In everyday life, we tend to notice only those things that are at eye level or below. Our natural inclination is to look down – to look at our feet as we walk, to make sure we don’t trip, to see where we are going in the next step. It takes intention and practice to look up and notice what is above our accustomed field of vision. Teach yourself to look up, because there are lights in the heavens, stars to be seen. To look up is an act of viewing things from a higher perspective, to see not only the details of the moment but a vision of the future. To look up is a metaphor for the ability to see opportunity in hard times, to hold fast to hope and faith, to realize that change is the only constant.

During this holiday season, it is especially important to look up and see the big picture. Many families are hurting from the tough economic times we face; others are grateful for whatever jobs they have and the ability to weather this storm. Looking up will provide you a broader perspective, and the assurance of brighter things to come.

In December, many religions celebrate the looking-up themes of hope and the promise of the future. Christians celebrate the birth of Jesus; Jews light Menorah candles to remember hope and the miracle of the temple lamp oil lasting eight nights; in early December, Buddhists celebrate Rohatsu, the anniversary of the enlightenment of the Buddha and the possibility of enlightenment for all beings; earth-centered religions anticipate the coming of longer days by lighting yule logs in the fireplace. In the Christmas story, the shepherds and the wise men literally look up to see a bright star, a light in the sky, that guided them to the birthplace of Jesus and the promise of the Christ’s message of love.

It is so easy to get caught up in darkness, whether it is the physical darkness of the winter days or the mental darkness of despair or just dull days. We light candles and fires to remind us to figuratively look up, to see that there is hope even in darkness, that the light will return just as surely as a new day will dawn. I derive great joy from the sweet turning and returning of this holy season. My hearts stirs with hope and faith when I observe stars in the winter night sky, Christmas lights in neighbor’s yards, and candles in the Menorah and in Christmas wreaths. I know that the days will start to lengthen and that warmth will return to our world. I give thanks that hope, love, joy and peace are celebrated at this time.

Remember, light always conquers darkness. Love and hope conquer fear. May peace reside in your heart. Look up and see the stars!

Posted by admin | Filed Under The Journey, blog

Reckoning and Anticipating on Black Friday

November 28, 2008 | Leave a Comment

Thanksgiving, which we celebrated in the US yesterday, is a celebration of God’s abundance – a time to give thanks for the harvest and for the many blessings in our lives. Today is the day after Thanksgiving, called in the popular press "Black Friday" because of the multitude of people who will descend on stores in hopes of finding a good bargain. For me, today is a day of reckoning and of anticipation. I am reckoning with the tightness of my jeans this morning, with all the leftover food in our refrigerator and the memory of spending all day in the kitchen yesterday. The words of my husband, who exclaimed last night as he was cleaning up after our extravagant feast, "This seems wasteful – why do we do this every year?" echo through my mind.

I didn’t have the words to answer my husband last night, but now I do: I reckon that for me to spend one day a year in the kitchen creating food for my family and friends is a creative and worthy endeavor. For me, preparing an extravagant Thanksgiving feast is a labor of love. It is a way to honor the memory of my mother, who was commander-in-chief of my birth family’s holiday feasts and celebrations. It is a way of celebrating God’s abundance, blessings and the love that I am so fortunate to share with my amazing family. This is why we do this every year. To do any less would seem, well, less abundantly thankful.

I am not against making Thanksgiving simpler, and I may be moved to do so in the future. For now, this is what feels right.

Today is also a day of anticipation of the coming holiday season. Many of you have already been out in the stores, snatching up a bargain and working on that Christmas life of gifts. For many, however, this Christmas will be a lean one, due to lay-offs, slow-downs and reduced revenues caused by an economy that seems to careen from one disaster to the next. Instead of focusing only on gift lists, Christmas cards and the business of the season, take some time today to anticipate how you will find meaning this holiday season. In addition to preparing a budget for your holiday gift spending, make a budget for participating in fulfilling holiday experiences, many of which cost no or little money.

What will bring you the most satisfaction during this holy time of Advent, Christmas, Hanukkah and the Solstice? How will you honor the birth of the Christ child and the return of the Light within you this season?

Will you re-commit to your personal prayer or meditation practice and be more faithful to it?
Will you attend a retreat or special religious service that connects you with the real meaning of the season?
Will you participate in a service project, either at your place of worship or in the community?
Will you contribute money to the causes and charities that mean the most to you?
Will you find some time in every day to listen for the still, small voice of God in your life?
Will you attend a concert, ballet, play or Christmas pageant that brings joy to your heart?
Will you bake a family recipe and deliver it to a friend?

Take some time today to reckon and anticipate. Take a reckoning of where you are right now, in all aspects of your life. Then, anticipate how you will celebrate the true meaning of the holiday season.

Posted by admin | Filed Under Abundance, The Journey, blog

The Importance of Beauty

November 23, 2008 | Leave a Comment

Beauty feeds the soul. It is important to recognize this and incorporate beauty into your everyday life. Beauty can be visual, auditory or tactile. It can be found in nature, in your home, in your leisure activities and at work. Because our inner life is reflected in our outer life and vice versa, the environment that we attract and create around us is a mirror of the beauty inside of us.

I was reminded of the need for beauty at a symphony concert last night. Classical music is a testimony to the highest emotions and spiritual yearnings of a human being. So much of classical music is religiously inspired or is the composer’s attempt to express his/her life’s meaning in the midst of its joys and sorrows. Listening to classical music, especially instrumental music, is the equivalent of reading a book vs. seeing a movie of the same book. The music invokes your imagination and emotions just like a book does, but it does not proscribe the visual images that you create with it. That is up to you.

Visual art also reflects the artist’s attempt to express his/her highest self amidst human frailty. I need to view art on a regular basis to feed my soul. In fact, I need some in my home. Nature is another form of beauty that is vital to the nourishment of our souls. Many people crave the sensory beauty of nature because in nature comes their most poignant connection to Source.

We need to incorporate beauty in everyday life. To some, that may mean preparing a beautiful meal every night. To others, it may mean wearing beautiful, stylish clothes. Or it may mean savoring a good glass of wine or beer. Or creating a beautiful home and garden, or bringing in a flower arrangement into the home or office every week. To some women, it may mean getting her fingernails done every other week. Thank goodness there is an endless variety of how humans can seek beauty. This diversity of tastes and preferences results in the rich and varied world around us.

Everything that we experience in this human body is spiritual, so our quest for beauty to feed our souls is a spiritual pursuit. Contrary to what you may have learned as a child, our whole body experience is God-given and everything about it is designed to provide joy and pleasure, and also challenges and learning opportunities.

Where does our search for beauty become ego-based and not spiritual? There is a fuzzy line between yearning for beauty to feed our soul and yearning for more and more things because of a need for prestige or social standing. When does the need for beauty turn the corner into a want for more?

Each person must examine their own values and motives in seeking beauty. There is nothing intrinsically wrong with wanting a beautiful house, car, clothing and other accoutrements of the abundant life. If your motive, deep inside, is to acquire more for show or prestige, then that is a want or a grasping. However, if your deepest motive is to seek beauty in order to live large and abundantly or to seek pleasure in love, then it is a pure desire. A puritanical approach to abundance, in which you eschew pleasure or worldly possessions to be a good person in God’s eyes, serves no one, including God. Again, God wants you to experience beauty, pleasure and abundance, because those are integral parts of the human experience – the human experience that God and your soul co-created for you.

And, because no life is without suffering, the experience of beauty provides a contrast to the experience of pain. In the midst of pain, the most comforting moment can be the recognition of beauty and pleasure – a reminder that life is never all bad.

Posted by admin | Filed Under The Journey, beauty, blog

Put a Stop to Labeling

October 23, 2008 | Leave a Comment

The human brain is wired to instantly categorize everything we perceive. This is a good thing in life threatening situations, as when you are about to step on a coiled rattlesnake on the ground and your brain calls out an immediate "Freeze!" warning to all muscles. Other times, however, that instant categorization mechanism that says "coiled snake-like object on ground equals danger!" can trip you up. What if the snake turns out to be a harmless garden hose? Your brain has sent a danger signal to your body for no reason. As you reach higher stages of emotional, moral and spiritual development, you need to check the brain’s instinctual tendency to label items or people as "good" or "bad", "safe" or "dangerous", "us" or "them". To create a spiritually intelligent workplace, we need to put a stop to labeling by using our higher spiritual powers.

This requires an evolution from duality thinking to "both/and" thinking. The instinctual part of the brain will continue to instantly categorize things but it is up to the executive function of the brain to translate those black and white judgments into inclusive, non-judgmental and holistic viewpoint. Once this translation is complete, the individual can now act in a considered, inclusive way. It looks like this:

Step three is critical. This is where the person’s vigilant "observer mind" catches itself doing its normal categorizing. The observer mind is that part of you that is divinely connected and represents your highest self. "Oops," says the observer mind, "Let’s not go there. What other perspective or viewpoint could I take that is more spiritually mature?" The brain reconsiders, assuming a broader, whole-cosmos perspective, and then chooses the best reaction to the stimulus. A good way to help your brain assume this whole-cosmos perspective is outlined in a previous post on the heavenly perspective.

This process goes slowly at first, as you engage the observer mind more actively. This requires spiritual will and perseverance to train your mind to catch itself as it jumps to conclusions that may not serve your highest truth. Persevere! Keep at it! There are precious rewards, such as increased love, compassion and inner peace, in making progress toward retraining your brain.

This is what the process looks like when you have made progress in re-training your brain to stop labeling:

The brain takes the high road, so to speak, and bounces lightly into the categorizing and labeling stages but quickly advances to the inclusive thinking.

You might even get so advanced as to skip steps two and three altogether. Bravo to you if you are here in your reactions:

Here are some labels that I’d like to adopt a more inclusive, whole-cosmos perspective of:

Christian	vs.	Muslim
Theist	vs.	Atheist
Republican	vs.	Democrat
Rich	vs.	Poor
Managers	vs.	Employees
Man	vs.	Woman
Straight	vs.	Gay
Good	vs.	Evil

I propose that, instead of labeling, we start thinking of all people as simply "children of God", "the Divine’s people" or "souls on a journey together". Easier said than done, huh?

Posted by admin | Filed Under Leadership, The Journey, blog

Resilience and the Power of the Human Spirit

August 31, 2008 | Leave a Comment

Alice Lee knows something about being resilient. She has had to be resilient to survive this far. You see, Alice has spinocerebellar ataxia type 3, an inherited neuro-muscular condition similar to ALS (Lou Gehrig’s disease). The disease is fatal, slowly reducing the person’s mobility and finally shutting down the body. But Alice decided early on in life – or was she just born feisty? – that she would not let adversity take her down forever. She decided to be a survivor, not a victim. “I get down sometimes,” Alice told me, “but I get right back up.” She means that both figuratively and literally.

Alice tested positive for ataxia in 1995, which killed both her mother and sister and perhaps several other family members, but it wasn’t until 2002 that she started to develop symptoms of the disease. Around that time that she brought a service dog into her life as a constant companion – Morgan, a beautiful golden retriever, who is in the picture, above, with Alice. Morgan knows over 90 voice commands, including “Get the phone, Morgan.” Alice says that dogs have a tendency to slobber on the phones they fetch, so she buys cheap ones and doesn’t care when Morgan ruins one! It was Morgan who saved Alice’s life in 2003, when she fell while alone in her home and broke her leg – and sprained her ankle. Morgan came to her side at once, and she told him, “Morgan, get the phone.” He brought her the phone, to which she had taped a list of the neighbors’ phone numbers. She was able to call her neighbor to ask for help.

After Morgan came to her aid, Alice was confined to a wheelchair. She remembers her mother was in a wheelchair for the last ten years of her life, and Alice wanted not to have that kind of life. She was determined to recover from the accident. “I’m not ready for this,” she declared to herself, referring to the end of her life. Instead of her fall being the beginning of the end, Alice sought out physical therapy and worked hard to regain her ability to walk. She was ambulatory when I met her at Upaya Zen Center in July of this year, five years after the fall. Her smile and spirit were strong and radiant. However, Alice must practice mindfulness all day, every day, because of her illness. “I have to be aware of where my feet are at all times,” says Alice. “I have to practice mindfulness or I’ll fall.”

I asked Alice about two things: pain and death. When I asked her about what it was like to know that she would die, she said, “We all die. I just have a little more information than most people about how my end will come. I’m not afraid of death, it is a part of the cycle of life. Society makes it scary. I feel that I’ve lived 3 lifetimes. If I die, I die, but I want to be here for my daughters and be a grandmother.”

Regarding pain, Alice said, “You just go through it. You let it come to you, then go through it. It’s your resistance that tries to keep it at bay. I breathe through the pain. When I was working, I had horrible back spasms. I couldn’t make my 30-minute commute without stopping to stretch several times. I would get out of my car, stretch and breathe.” Alice is grateful for the muscle relaxers and pain medication that keeps the pain at bay, and recommends that others who suffer from pain seek medical help in that way also.

Alice is facing another test of her resilience: Her faithful service dog, Morgan, who has served her so faithfully for more than five years, has developed arthritis and needs to retire from his service dog duties. Alice needs a new dog that will be trained by Assistance Dogs of the West (a non-profit organization) for the hefty price of $3500.00. Alice has $1750 already, but needs help raising the other half. Her dog dancing group, The Santa Fe Dog Dancing Club, is holding a fundraiser for her tomorrow, Friday, August 29, 2008, at which they hope to raise the rest of the purchase price (another $1750.00) for another service dog for Alice.

Alice’s story and her spirit have touched me deeply. Alice is resilient, but she needs our help. Please join me in contributing to the cost of a new service dog to join brave Morgan in caring for Alice. You can make a tax deductible donation at www.assistancedogsofthewest.org (at the bottom of the page, click on “make a donation”. In the comment field, please type “for the Alice Lee Fund”). Any amount that you can give from your heart is most welcome! Let’s help Alice stay resilient!

Blessings to all.

Posted by admin | Filed Under The Journey, blog

Take Nothing Personally: A Process for Workplace Productivity

July 30, 2008 | 1 Comment

The scene: a hip and fashionable downtown restaurant. A high-ranking manager of a technology company and several of his team members are enjoying lunch together to celebrate the team’s recent achievement. As the conversation veers off onto casual topics, one of the employees excitedly explains about a new start-up company for which her cousin was named president, ending with, “Wouldn’t you just love to be in her shoes?” The boss turns to her and says, “You wouldn’t love that – you’d hate it. You wouldn’t be comfortable as an entrepreneur.” The conversation stops briefly as all heads turn to see how the employee would react to the boss’s cutting remark. “Hmmm,” said the employee slowly, “That’s an interesting observation.” The lunchtime chatter quickly turns to another topic.

Take nothing personally – this is easier said than done. The employee in the scenario described above was me, and the conversation took place many, many years ago. I wish I could say that I didn’t take the boss’s remark personally, but honestly, I did for a while. What I realize now is that the boss was speaking from his own perspective, emotions and needs. His opinion of my abilities was colored by his own “stuff”.

Each of us views life through completely different lenses – it is as if we each wear a different pair of glasses that allow us to focus differently, to block out certain information and to interpret events in a singular way. We take in and process information through our unique lenses, which restricts us to acting solely out of our own perspective. These lenses are colored by our personalities and our talents, which were developed during our formative years. The lenses also reflect our current needs and our previous experiences, especially if they were negative, emotionally-charged events. The brain stores emotional memories so they can be accessed in a nanosecond, causing us to react in a knee-jerk fashion that has little to do with the present situation.

The boss’s words to his employee in the lunchtime conversation were filtered through his lens of needs, personality and emotional experiences. I cannot accurately guess what that lens was, but I know now that it was about him, not about me.

Now that I’m older and wiser, I would choose a different reaction to my boss’ words. Instead of turning his remark inward and taking it personally, I can now see that his remark is coming directly from his lens or perspective of the situation. Here are the steps that I would now take in this situation.

The “Take Nothing Personally” Process:

Stop the knee-jerk reaction: As with most processes, the first step is the most difficult but the most important. To stop a knee-jerk reaction requires a high level of self-awareness – in other words, we need to be aware of our reaction in the moment in order to stop it. Fortunately, we can learn to be aware of our reactions by habitually taking a breath before responding to every situation. Adopt a mental image of yourself as calm and serene in the midst of adversity, which will help you to pause when you are being triggered by someone’s remarks or actions.
Pause. The best way to keep from taking it personally is to redirect your mental energies from the emotional brain to the logical brain. Count to ten – backwards and in French! – is a great way to divert your mind to its analytical, rather than emotional, functions.
Say to yourself, “That’s one person’s opinion.” Remind yourself that the person is speaking or acting from a viewpoint that encompasses their emotional memories, needs and personality. It has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with them. Without judgment, you might try to imagine what might cause them act or speak as they did.
Take care of yourself. You might affirm yourself by saying, “I know I am a capable, intelligent person.” You might remember a time when you were completely happy or proud of yourself – we call this a “positive anchor”. You might call your partner, best friend or Mom and ask them for a pep talk – and bask in their love.

Taking nothing personally will lighten the emotional and spiritual burden you carry. It will also improve your interpersonal relationships. Imagine the possibilities of a frictionless, productive workplace created by a team that works under the motto of “Take nothing personally!” What a wonderful place that would be.

Posted by admin | Filed Under The Journey, blog

Simple Everyday Miracles that We Give Each Other

June 17, 2008 | Leave a Comment

Most of the time, we go through life totally oblivious to how our words and deeds can positively affect – indeed, change the course of – another person’s life. It could be a simple observation we say to someone, it could be a random act of kindness (as simple as a smile), or it could be the role model we become for others that can make all the difference. Several instances have come to my notice this week that remind me of the way we are connected to and bless each other. And most of the time, we have no idea that we have given a miracle to another person!

Last week, I received an email from a friend who thanked me for helping her get through a tough episode during a recent road trip. I replied to her email saying I didn’t know what I did to help her. She explained that the example I set of praying before meetings at our church gave her a tool and the inner strength to get through that difficult time. I was flabbergasted. I had no idea that I had any influence over her or any other person.

Similarly, I recently received a text message from a friend who thanked me for being an angel for her. I texted her back to ask if she sent the message to the wrong person! No, she assured me, I was the intended recipient. She was thanking me for being there for her during some rough times.

Here’s another example: Several months ago, an executive at a large company hired me to consult with her department. She assigned a much younger woman to be one of my main contacts for the project. I took the younger woman to lunch after our project was done, and she told me what an outstanding role model the executive had been to her, teaching her that a woman could be both business-like and caring in a high-level job. With the young woman’s permission, I mentioned her words to the executive, who, like me in the previous stories, was flabbergasted that she had that much influence over another person.

And, the story continues. That executive (who gave me permission to write about this) recently received a LinkIn.com invitation from another younger woman who thanked her for being a great role model to her. And get this – this young woman never worked for the executive, but her husband did!

I can think of times when friends and acquaintances have done something for me or said something simple that profoundly affected me and influenced my life’s journey, if only just a tiny bit. Even tiny mid-course corrections can change the ultimate destination of a journey. If you are driving north from Austin, veering left at a critical junction instead of bearing straight can mean the difference between arriving in Dallas or Fort Worth! So that means that I am here, right now, writing to you in this blog because of all the tiny miracles I have so abundantly received, that each changed my life’s course if only a little. It gives me shivers to think about it.

I ask you to do two simple things:

Be aware of the simple, everyday miracles that bless your life. Did someone smile at you at the grocery store? Did someone hold open a door for you? Did a co-worker bring you coffee? If you can, make that person’s day by thanking them.
Take advantage of opportunities to create a simple, everyday miracle in someone else’s life. Smile, laugh, love and perform acts of random kindness. You may never know how you affect another person, but do it anyway. It will make you feel good, even in the middle of a busy, stressful day.

Posted by admin | Filed Under Newest Posts, The Journey, Work, blog

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