Job Searches, Forgiveness and the Power of Intentions

January 28, 2010

A good friend graciously allowed me to interview her about her recent job search.  Hers is a story of losing her job, forgiving her past employer and finding another, even-better job.  There are many lessons in it for you and for me.  I’ll let her tell it in the following question and answer format:

Kristin: Tell us about your job loss last winter.

My Friend: I worked at a very well respected company, probably the top in my field.  When I was originally recruited to work there, I was extremely flattered.  But while I was well liked by my peers and respected by many, I never really felt comfortable working for such a large organization.  The huge management structure, the inevitable politics and bureaucracy were not really me.

When the economy took a dive, the pressure was on.  Corporate told us that there would need to be some cuts.  My manager, whom I adored, was let go. There was a re-org at the end of 2008 and then I just knew, but could never confirm – I was on ‘THE LIST’.  I lived for weeks of uncertainty that turned into a 3-month waiting game.

Finally, I was laid off last March.  While I was resentful on how they secretly planned it and communicated the news to me, I felt relieved.  The uncertainty was over; I now knew what action I needed to take. Networking!

K: It seems to me that you got over being resentful of your past employer faster than others I have coached and mentored.  What’s your secret?

MF: Kristin, you’ve commented many times about my ability to forgive my last employer.  I never saw it as forgiveness but rather simply moving on.  Even early on in my job search, I secretly thanked my former employer for letting me go. I knew I wasn’t happy in that environment but was paralyzed by the shaky economy and too mesmerized by working at #1 to go looking for a new job.  They forced me out – like a mother bird forces her hatchling out to fly.

K: What was your approach to finding the perfect job?

MF: I don’t know my ‘life’s purpose’ so I can only be the best person I can be.  I consider myself spiritual, but not religious.  I do a lot of reading – for business, for thinking and for fun.  I stumbled on the Law of Attraction through a study group I was involved in and it just resonated with me.  I learned that what you think about and focus on often happens. So, instead of focusing on past hurts, I decided to focus on the present and the future.

I started doing little things like visualizing a sunny day for my daughter’s birthday pool party.  The day of the party, it rained all morning, but by the time the party was about to begin, we had warm, sunny skies. With that kind of success under my belt, I applied the lessons to my job search.

K: You had some early successes that gave you courage – then what did you do to focus on your job search?

MF: I decided to only go after what resonated with me.  I was lucky that I had savings and had COBRA (continuation of medical insurance coverage), but I also had FAITH that I would get a job I wanted. When I thought about a particular job with a particular type of company with a particular product, I felt myself get excited.  When I told people what I wanted to do, I found I would speak faster and become more animated.  I don’t know why I felt that way and I spent many hours trying to understand it. I resonated with this type of position, so I spent time visualizing it and examining what made me so passionate about it.

I pursued one company and ended up being their #2 choice.  That bit of news set me back emotionally for a few days.  But, I moved on and kept telling myself, “There’s a reason why that one didn’t work out and the right one will!” I even had the gumption to say to more than one person, “I really want to take the summer off to be with the kids, then by the end of the summer, I’ll have a couple of job offers so I can chose the right one.”  On August 29th, I got my first job offer and a week later, got a second.

K: Isn’t that interesting that your words became a self-fulfilling prophesy!

MF: That’s right!  And what’s more amazing is that I landed at a company that was exactly as I visualized if not better.  It is a smaller organization but with some benefits I was surprised they offered.  They have an extremely experienced management team that, so far, seems to have no hidden agenda.  They share and treat me as a valued part of the organization. I am thankful to be there.

K: As we finish up, what words of wisdom do you have for job seekers and others who are trying to follow their dreams?

MF: If you take anything from reading this, my message is simple: Let go of the past, thank it for teaching you a life experience – albeit not a pleasant one, but one that helps you know what you DON’T want and will help you appreciate where you land next.  Focus on what you do want – visualize it clearly – and have faith that you will get it.  Make a decision that resonates with your highest values, your highest self – you’ll know it when you see it!  Until then, be patient.  My best wishes for you all!

K: Thanks so much, good friend, for your insight and wisdom.

Kristin Robertson of Brio Leadership loves to interview friends for this newsletter and blog.  If you have a workplace story to tell about values in action, such as forgiveness, positive thoughts, compassion and integrity, please contact Kristin here.


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Comments

One Response to “Job Searches, Forgiveness and the Power of Intentions”

  1. Mariel Peterson on February 6th, 2010 3:29 pm

    This is so encouraging – something that many of us need especially right now. I needed the reminder to visualize the dream and be open to possibilities today. Thank you both so much!

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